Am I pregnant or is this menopause?

It was right after the Thanksgiving holiday as I was trying to get the family ready for the end of year school activities, preparing for our ski trip AND finalizing Christmas shopping.  I glanced at my calendar and noticed that I was supposed to be getting my monthly period.  This time, I was so eager to have it before our trip to Aspen.  A few days go by... nothing.  A week passes and now I'm really worried.  I open up to a close friend whose first reaction was pause and then laughter.  She actually said "I love that the options are either pregnancy or menopause at this point!"  It was funny but I was panicking. I stop by at my local Rite Aid store after dropping the kids off at school in the morning to buy a pack of "Home Pregnancy Test."  Seriously?  What is happening here?  I am a 44 year old woman with two [grown] kids - well, grown enough not to be in diapers and/or strollers.  I have NO time nor the patience for a baby in my life.  How is that even a possibility at this age?  I'm truly freaked out at this point.  

I rushed home and ripped the packaging apart.  The last time I peed on a stick, I was in my 30's!  It was the most uncomfortable couple of minutes on a cold wintery morning.  I waited patiently and then peed on the same stick AGAIN.  What am I doing? I should know better... A very faded line started showing up.  I think I stopped blinking at this point as I was staring at the stick.  Nothing happened.  Just a faded bluish grey line.  I looked at the box to make sure this actually meant Not Pregnant. It did. Phew. I'm not pregnant. But wait, does this mean that I have already reached menopause?!  What is worse: being pregnant at 44 or reaching menopause at 44? Too old for pregnancy and too young for menopause!

I must admit that I was so relieved that pregnancy was out the window.  But now what?  What does this mean to me?  I started having flashbacks to when my mother was going through menopause and it was not pretty.  The moods, hot flashes... Oh yes, the hot flashes that I have been going through in the past year must be all related to what's happening to my body now.  All those sleepless sweaty nights are making more sense now.  I just hope they don't last a lifetime. Of course as we are getting ready for our winter holiday vacation, I'm all paranoid that I might get my period on a ski slope.  I pack whatever I can in my suitcase, handbag and pockets.  Because who knows when I might get a visitor.

Around mid January, I finally got my period after 2 months. Oh, the joy I felt.  But when it lasted for 12 days of heavy bleeding, I was very concerned.  I immediately contacted my GYN's office and made an appointment.  After all sorts of tests and blood works, my doctor confirmed that I was officially in my pre-menopausal stage. I actually felt depressed and could not believe this stage of my life is already here.  I had so many thoughts and questions going through my head, so I asked the nurse "So, what do I do now?"  She suggested, exercise more; eat less fat; no alcohol or spicy food late at night since they contribute to the hot flashes; and take a calcium supplement daily.

Okay, it's not the end of the world and I can certainly manage; however, this all feels so unknown and happened faster than I thought.  I must admit that I have been noticing a change in my body and that makes this whole experience a lot more depressing.  I feel that I have no control over my weight, skin break-outs and saggy skin any longer.  Exercise has never been my thing, especially cardio.  I also always believed in eating EVERYTHING in moderation and never deprived myself of anything.

I believe the time has now come to make certain changes in my lifestyle...

Stay healthy.


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